12 December 2010


So much to say. So much sleep to be had.

Its finals week. And two classes I am super comfortable with my grades. Another class, I am holding my breath. Not because I slacked off, but because I genuinely didn't get it. And I kid you not, that is the first time that has happened.

I was loading PostSecret tonight and a few secrets didn't load. Which is so weird because they always do. I clicked on the first one that didn't load for me. And there was my secret staring me in the face. Not MY secret because I didn't send it in. But what I imagine my postcard would say if I did send one in. And no, I won't tell you which secret it was.

Do you ever run into people that you haven't seen in years, only to question every little move you  made when the exchange was over? I did this more than once this weekend. Am I overly self-conscious? I'm gonna venture and say probably. I'm not gonna say who it was, simply because I saw so many people this weekend and I didn't do this every time I saw someone. But seriously, one conversation I went over and over in my head. The person NEVER gave any indication that it was awkward or off or anything. I don't know I just couldn't get it off my mind.

I used to be so extroverted. I was a goof ball and just plain didn't care what people thought? This has totally changed. I saw something tonight on someone's status. And it made me think of who I used to be; what I used to stand for. Don't get me wrong, I know who I am, but its the shy keep to myselfness (yes I know thats not a word) that has me bugged.

I guess, and I've said this before, its that I don't know how to meet other people outside the bar. And let me tell you- I am SO over the bar scene. That life will get you nowhere and fast.

I dunno.. maybe when I get to Texas...

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