13 February 2011

Turning Point

Twice this weekend I have heard the same thing. Something that I didn't know was true, and I'm still not sure it is. Twice people have told me this weekend that I look happy.

But am I? I most definitely have my moments. But, am I truly happy. Well outside reports say that I am. So, either I am actually happy and I have been fooling myself for a while. Or I am realllly good at acting like I am okay.

So which one is the truth? I really have no idea. Maybe it is some combination of the two options. Here is what I do know. I do know that I am accomplishing way more in my life lately than I have in a long time (plus!). I am absolutely uncomfortable with my own body (minus!) I don't have a social life (sorry Andrew! haha [plus for my bank account; minus for me]).

I also know that I feel human again. Its strange to say that, but I have spent soooo long hiding inside my walls. But, I'm slowly breaking through the wall and feeling comfortable talking to people around me; I typically am very shy.

I guess this is a big turning point and I can finally start to rebuild for good. Or maybe I just had a good weekend. Let's hope for the former.

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